JUST BREATHE
It’s fascinating to be at a point in life when friends begin to start their sentences with “Remember when we were growing up…?”. When your frame of reference can reach back past cellphones and personal computers. Before the internet. Before helicopter parenting and viral thinking.
A time that rides the cusp. The in-between that gets to experience either side. We entered the technology tunnel and came out looking back for what once was. But we can only move forward in this life. To mold the future ahead, together.
Alongside the ability and access that comes with these advancements, there is a discomfort in and resistance to change. This is natural. The good ol’ days are relative. It just depends on individual frames of reference. And I’m fortunate enough to have made it thus far to enjoy the difference in past and present.
This discomfort manifests in a multitude of different ways. It can be stress or anxiety or depression. It can be uncontrolled thought or emotions that result in rash decision making. Or it can be as simple as sadness. A mourning of the present through the lens of the past. Not so simple anymore.
What hasn’t changed is our ability to find balance in what can be controlled. The acceptance of the world as it is and realizing that the world does not define each and every individual experience. The active choice to exist how you feel appropriate and share this wisdom in each interaction. To live and lead through example. To learn from the many other ways life can play out and still retain focus for a personal path.
During my most idealistic days of social change and efforts for equality, my mother repeated a thought I continually struggled with: You can’t get too caught up in the world because it will consume you. Instead, create a bubble around your life and exist in this bubble.
Essentially, what my mother expressed to me was that the only thing you can control is yourself. How bittersweet it is to look back and finally see the scope of this vision. To realize the potency of this concept and how it applies in more expansive ways than revolutionary thinking. How much more productive it is to begin change on a personal level and allow that to grow outside my self. It becomes infectious. It goes viral.
It’s a step in the direction of fighting fire with water. To move into the shade when the chaotic rays of the sun bring their greatest heat. Observing the tumultuous waves of thought and, instead of going in, staying on the shore and deciding to watch and listen.
Countless techniques may be used in this process, but only one is something we already do every second of every day.
Breathing.
Having a breathing practice is the difference between an alert nervous system and one that may enter into a relaxed state. The ability to switch from sympathetic (fight or flight) to parasympathetic (rest and digest) is a major reason why many embrace meditation. And the breath is a great first step into meditation.
Box Breathing, also known as Square Breathing, is a very simple way to have a visual to easily remember the process. Visualize a square and each of its four sides. You can even draw the box with your finger if it helps. Each side will have an equal amount of time devoted to it, and for this exercise we will use 4 seconds for each side of the square. It’s natural to close your eyes during a practice like this, but it’s not required. Do what brings you the greatest comfort.
The first side is the inhale. Allow the breath to enter your diaphragm and expand the belly. Show off your Buddha belly.
The second side is holding the breath in. Continue to relax and expand the diaphragm. Appreciate the Buddha belly.
The third side is the exhale. Bring the belly in a push the air out of the diaphragm.
The fourth side is another breath hold.
Begin the box again.
There may be some variety in where you find individual comfort. Try different amounts of time and see which one works best for your needs. It’s easiest to gauge at either hold. If your breath hold is comfortable and without struggle, you’re doing great.
Use this practice throughout your day.
Woke up before your alarm? Breathe.
Waiting in the car for the kids? Breathe.
Drinking coffee and reading the news? Breathe instead. Please.
Waiting for water to boil? Breathe.
Getting into an argument? Breathe as you listen. What you hear may surprise you.
There is no bad time to breathe. And if you’d really like to feel the shift in nervous system activity, it’s recommended to do this practice for 15-20 minutes. It takes time to signal to the nervous system that everything is under control, but once it receives the message…
Add a drop of Lavender (Masculine/Air) to your third eye or heart chakra for added balance and calmness. Allow Lavender to still a wandering mind. To encourage compassion. The high vibrational frequency helps to cleanse you, your thoughts, and your environment.
As the adage goes: the most difficult thing you’ve been through is the most difficult thing you’ve been through.
Even as our experiences differ there is something very important we all reach for in times of need — Hope.
Hope is how we look forward and see movement is beautiful. It’s how to accept rapid change and find excitement in the opportunity. But hope can only be seen by those willing to reach for what is good.
The fear and unsureness felt by one generation is the innocent past of another. The days we see as future will one day be the next generation’s good ol’ days. And the square continues. Each side relies on the others for balance. For integrity. For hope.
Because our product will always be greater than the sum of its parts.
Stay wild,
Dariusz
