Boring Burdens
Have you ever been sitting on the toilet and, all of a sudden, you crap out a thought nugget? Or watched an a-ha-shower-moment get washed away along with your dirt, sweat, and tears?
The brain has a funny way of responding to an idle state - it begins to wander.
Mind-wandering is when you’re less aware of external information and more focused on internal thoughts.
Your body is busy doing something that requires very little attention, so your mind begins to wander.
Illustration by Charlie Taylor @c.e.b.t. (http://www.mylittleplaceofcalm.com/the-wonderings-of-a-wandering-mind/)
Your wandering mind is the product of an insanely interconnected part of your brain called the Default Mode Network (DMN). The Default Mode Network (DMN) kicks in when you are not focused on a task. Since you’re not busy doing something, your brain relaxes, and you start day-dreaming or spacing out.
It’s like your brain gets up from the desk, leaves the office, and takes a walk to feed the ducks.
Mind-wandering is an extremely useful tool when you’re working out creative ideas and looking for unique connections.
Or when you’re weighing your options and playing with possible outcomes.
It’s great for introspection and reflection to find out who you are or who you want to be.
It’s an “I”-focused, self-aware process that helps you gather an understanding of yourself and your existence.
Once you focus on a new task (crunching numbers, talking to someone, reading) your brain returns from the walk and gets back to work.
The switch from mind-wandering (Default Mode Network) to getting back on task happens through the Salience Network (SN). The Salience Network (SN) does a bunch of stuff. Right now, let its only job be switching between mind-wandering and on-task focusing.
The Salience Network (SN) switches from mind-wandering (DMN) to the Central Executive Network (CEN).
The Central Executive Network (CEN) is what drives action. It uses what you’re trying to get done (internal drive) and how you prefer to do it (personal preference) in order to find the right action.
Imagine you’re standing on one side of a river. This side is the DMN and your mind is wandering. You’re making cool connections and thinking about why you believe something is true.
But then you realize you need to write an email for work. This realization activates your SN bridge to come down.
You take the bridge, leaving mind-wandering behind, and cross to the CEN to write the email for work.
The bridge goes back up and waits for when you want to cross back over to mind-wandering.
Your mind can’t be wandering when you’re giving a presentation or balancing your company’s budget . In that moment your CEN is fully engaged and working on a task. You need to pay full attention.
But it can wander when you’re taking a crap or showering.
When you take a walk or do some gardening.
It even wanders when you drive, like when 3 hours of travel blurs together and you don’t remember a thing.
My favorite time to wander is during physically repetitive tasks.
A 2015 study found that when your mind is wandering your ability to complete a repetitive task goes up.
The wandering mind (DMN) complements the task completing part of the brain (CEN).
The Dorsolateral Prefrontal Cortex (DLPFC) is a major area of CEN activity.
Fun Fact
Injury to the Dorsolateral Prefrontal Cortex (DLPFC) can result in the patient suffering from repetitive compulsory behaviors and tics (study). This is an important part of the brain when it comes to repetitive action.
In the study, the DLPFC was externally stimulated three different ways:
fully
partially (tickled)
not at all
The test subjects were given a repetitive task to complete — watch a screen and hit the space bar for every number except the number three (3).
Participants receiving stimulation to the Dorsolateral Prefrontal Cortex (DLPFC) experienced more mind-wandering AND improved task-completion rates.
The wandering brain, through the mingling networks, focused more efficiently on completing the task.
These seemingly mutually exclusive networks (DMN vs CEN) come together and provide a practical synergy.
It’s like you were meant to get some thinking done while doing boring, repetitive things.
This means your mind-wandering doesn’t have to be limited to toilet time —
As if! Everyone is on their phones whilst pushing out that large.
Which is gross because your use-it-all-day-device is entering the room designated for your waste.
You’re also flushing the opportunity to get some mind wandering done.
Sidenote
Close the lid when you flush. The pressure from the flush throws bacteria, viruses, etc. into the air. It’s called a toilet plume. Those little particles settle on your toothbrush, hair dryer, whatever you’ve got in there, and some of those things go in your mouth later that evening… it’s pretty gnarly.
Hygiene aside — if you’re busy with your phone on the toilet, how will your mind have time to wander?
Maybe you’re not willing to stop watching cat videos in the loo.
Try mind-wandering during physically repetitive tasks.
The tasks we frequently demonize as tedious.
The routine and monotony of cleaning, cooking, organizing, or whatever else you find tedious, can be discouraging. It’s not something to look forward to. It’s dreaded.
The reason behind doing the task is simple: because I have to.
But, just like the phone in the bathroom, there is a lost opportunity here.
Taking the time to settle into the task will relax your mind and let it wander.
Consider something physically repetitive that you may actually enjoy doing.
Exercise
Hiking, walking, running, cycling
Labor Intensive
Digging a hole in the ground, moving a pile of dirt, painting, sanding, grouting
Personal exploration
Gardening, caring for animals, sculpting
All of these have one thing in common: repetitive movement.
You’re doing the same shit over and over and over again.
Maybe you feel zen’d out. Blissed out. Zoned in.
Whatever you like to call it.
Part of the reason it brings you such pleasure is probably the fact that you’re getting something done (physical action / CEN) and your mind gets the opportunity to wander (DMN).
I can imagine the reactions.
Yeah, but running gives me endorphins. Vacuuming just sucks.
When I hike I see beautiful things. I don’t see cool shit when I’m washing dishes.
I garden to relax. Prepping meals for my picky kids does not relax me.
This is all true.
What is also true is that you have choice over the stories you tell yourself.
Telling yourself I always need to be entertained is making sure you never wander again. Without wandering you risk missing out on the self-aware, reflective state that may inform who you want to be or how you want to act.
Where else will your vision of yourself come from if not from inside you?
(Answer coming soon)
Simply put, spending time with yourself is good for better understanding yourself.
Cleaning your space is spending time with yourself.
It’s also a simple expression of care to yourself and those who cohabitate with you.
Think of the tedious task as an opportunity to wander around your thoughts. You get something done more efficiently thanks to the DMN-CEN synergy, and possibly come out the other end with a new realization or connection.
At the very least you’ll have finished something without contesting it the entire time.
Path of least resistance, right?
Maybe eventually you’ll begin to look forward to those tedious tasks.
Rewriting your approach to tedious tasks will help you focus on what you want to get out of it instead of maintaining a story based on why you don’t want to do it.
How many times have you heard someone saying they need to relax?
The story I need to relax is a tedious statement.
Our ideas of relaxation are compared to a fully stressed state.
Relaxation is the opposite of the always-grinding, headless-chicken state of being.
It’s the margarita on the beach away from all of life’s noises.
I disagree.
Relaxation is a choice.
Look in unexpected places.
Monastic rituals such as cleaning toilets, washing dishes, folding laundry, can give you the calm you’re looking for throughout your day.
It’s the time you need to slow down and focus on yourself because your body is going through familiar motions. The task has become a way to relax.
Let your brain step away from the office to take a walk and feed the ducks.
Make relaxation the latest reflex.
Article Citations
Shofty, B., Gonen, T., Bergmann, E. et al. (2022). The default network is causally linked to creative thinking. Mol Psychiatry 27, 1848–1854 (2022). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41380-021-01403-8
Axelrod, V., Rees, G., Lavidor, M., and Bar, M. (2015). Increasing propensity to mind-wander with transcranial direct current stimulation. Proc. Natl. Acad. Sci. U. S. A. 112, 3314–3319. doi: 10.1073/pnas.1421435112
Fremont R, Dworkin J, Manoochehri M, et al. (2022). Damage to the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex is associated with repetitive compulsive behaviors in patients with penetrating brain injury. BMJ Neurology Open;4:e000229. https://neurologyopen.bmj.com/content/4/1/e000229#ref-25
Image Citations
Desk Worker https-//www.biorxiv.org/content/10.1101/2020.10.19.344101v1.full
Brain Scans https-//www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnbeh.2014.00171/full
Skull https://www.diytdcs.com/2014/11/insight-a-growth-project-driven-by-tdcs-
cognitive-enhancement-montage-location-l-a-dlpfc-r-c-supra-orbital/
Brain’s Chains
Our wild and complex brains have no way of telling the conscious and unconscious mind don’t or stop.
When you run through worst-case scenarios involving the ones you love, does saying don’t think about that provide a solution?
When you sit down to meditate and tell yourself stop thinking, does it work?
When you’ve watched something gruesome and can’t stop seeing it and your friend keeps torturing you with the description, does your friend or brain adhere to the order no more?
Our brains have done a fantastic job when faced with nature’s indifference.
Survival has provided the brain with problems to solve. And the brain evolves.
Your brain will continue to focus on the ideas that appeal to survival.
These ideas will probably be negative.
This beautiful evolutionary tool is our negativity bias.
Decision-making tends to focus on AVOIDING bad results, rather than ACCOMPLISHING good ones.
Your amygdala, the fight-or-flight part of your brain system, is majority negative detectors (2/3 negative vs 1/3 positive).
Humans spotlight negative thoughts. It has insured our survival.
Imagine having an all-positive-amygdala and seeing a mother-bear with her cubs.
Your thoughts may focus on how soft her fur appears, the playful ways she interacts with her cubs, and the adorable noises cubs make.
And then momma-bear notices you — not your heart-shaped eyes — and you’re living the grizzly scene from The Revenant.
It is much more useful to assume a threat and be proven wrong than assume no threat and be surprised.
Threats are still all around us, but they’re much more elusive. It’s not as clear cut as spotting an animal or prepping for a storm.
The privilege of living in a technologically-focused society is ease of survival. And our brains continue adjusting to understand this state of being and the new dangers that come with it.
Next time you spill some inner darkness and your optimistic friend suggests Just Be Positive, conceal the intense urge to strangle them and, instead, explain the evolutionary benefit of focusing on the negative.
Then mention how useless and simplistic their advice is — people need to hear this.
But all is not lost in the struggle against evolutionary wiring.
Before information can make it to your brain it travels through a nerve bundle in the brain stem — the Reticular Activating System (RAS).
The RAS places a filter on the insane amount of sensory information coming into the brain. That way you can exist without experiencing debilitating information-overwhelm every second of the day.
This filter really shines when it comes to something threatening you.
Only information pertaining to surviving the threat will filter through: escape routes, weapons, enemy weaknesses, etc.
But we live cushy lives compared to our nature-dwelling ancestors, so what use is this RAS?
Ever been in a room full of random chatting but distinctly heard your name mentioned?
Heard a baby’s soft cry over the distorted guitar you’re playing?
Said you hate a song and now it’s the only song anyone ever plays? (suggestion: stop lying, you love that song)
The RAS connects the conscious with the unconscious.
Your name, the baby crying, and that song you “hate” have been deemed important by your conscious mind.
The filtered information allows name, baby cry, and song to come through every single time, unconsciously.
Try this.
You’re prompted to focus your attention on how many times the players wearing white shirts pass the ball.
So your RAS does exactly as it’s told: watch the white shirts, count the number of passes.
You perceive everything that is happening in the video, but your brain becomes aware of the chosen foci (white shirts, ball passing).
In order to stay focused on the task, all other information is filtered out.
Looking isn’t the same as seeing.
Essentially, the RAS finds the proof you’re looking for in order to validate a belief.
You experience arousal every time you see, hear, or feel what you’re looking for.
And the small price you pay is limited attention.
Dr. Andrew Huberman gives a valuable explanation of the RAS and its many different roles.
In the interview he talks about how reticular nerves operate our emotional facial expressions.
This may be why smiling is suggested during meditation or breathing exercises — the smile is the belief being validated.
Unfamiliar with Huberman?? Say his name three (3) times and let your RAS do the rest.
Or just succumb to the algorithm. They’re both filters.
We have this filter sifting through information headed for the brain.
It’s rarely being used as a survival mechanism in our mostly unthreatened lives.
And sometimes it just makes things more annoying (like that song you deny loving).
But it’s also an opportunity to focus your attention on what you want.
Focus on intent.
If you don’t focus your brain on something, it will find things that arouse reaction.
This is why so many people enjoy focusing on politics, but so few try to engage in any sort of discourse.
The arousal is addictive and the intent attached to it is typically very negative (think: intent to…).
Intent is your aim or purpose. It’s what you tell your brain to focus on.
If I tell my brain to focus on a group of people as my enemy, it will find evidence for this belief.
If I tell my brain to focus on my failures and inabilities, it will find evidence for this belief.
And if I tell my brain to stop thinking about these two examples, it will continue finding evidence proving these beliefs.
If you can’t order your brain to do something, then what is there to do?
Focus on intent.
Intend to be grateful.
One of the best ways to help your mind focus on positive things is to spend time in a state of gratitude.
For some this is writing in a gratitude journal. Others prefer prayer. Still others act out their gratitude by sharing.
Everyone has a way to gratitude. Paying attention to gratitude will help filter negativity and focus positivity.
A few weeks ago I started telling the water I drink I love you.
This was influenced by the ideas of Dr. Masaru Emoto, who claimed that the way you speak to water impacts its shape and structure.
He also tested cooked rice.
The rice receiving I love you fermented, while the rice receiving I hate you rotted.
Learn how to say Je t’aime and share it with someone. Hearing I love you in another language may arouse something…
This experiment has been replicated in so many different ways and, as you may have expected, with mixed results.
But I’m not really interested in the validity of parapsychology (in this case transferring my emotional energy to water).
Whether or not the water receives your intention isn’t important.
What’s important is the personal result of the expressed intention.
Gratitude isn’t an important practice because of its effect on other people or things (although that may be a byproduct).
It’s important because of what YOU experience practicing gratitude.
Just the same, when I thank the water entering my body I’m not focused on how the water may be reacting to my appreciation.
I visualize the water diffusing throughout my body.
I think about the many bodily processes that rely on movement of water.
The moment it touches my parched tongue I appreciate the ease with which I can find water and that my experience of thirst is near-nonexistent.
I know that without this molecule I will not survive.
I am humbled by water. So I express appreciation for it.
Appreciating water brings me back into myself and cuts out all the noise of daily life.
Our automated actions like drinking water or eating food become individual experiences.
I am not simply drinking for hydration. I am drinking to feel the water give me life.
I am not eating to avoid hunger. I am eating to nurture my body.
These habits lead me into valuing each moment with appreciation.
I breathe more deeply throughout the day because I am thankful for the breath.
I devote my attention to a conversation because I am grateful for the connection.
These habits are invaluable and may, at most, cost a moment of time.
There is a catch phrase that goes with many different movements — If you’re not angry, you’re not paying attention.
But there is a serious flaw with this logic.
When you are angry you have chosen a specific filter for the information coming in.
The information that makes it to your brain will be focused on validating your angry belief.
Sounds unproductive.
I offer a revision of the phrase — If you’re grateful, you’re paying attention.
Connect the conscious & unconscious mind by focusing on gratitude.
Your brain will begin to seek out information to validate your belief in gratitude.
From this place of gratitude, set your intentions.
Your intent can change day-to-day depending on what you’re working to accomplish or how you’d like to see yourself.
It may be focused on a long-term goal (career, family) or something more immediate (interaction with partner).
Navigating your goals through the filter of gratitude will focus your brain on the positive.
Your need for a negativity bias may diminish.
Your experience of fight-or-flight may become rare and tailored to extremes.
And the inspiration to accomplish your goals will come as people and potential.
Know your power.
Intend to be grateful.
Nut Butter: The Case of the Nut-Soaker
Making your own nut butter is a great way to save money and customize your nut blend for optimal enjoyment.
Seems simple enough — take a bunch of nuts and blend them until a nut butter forms.
You’re not wrong. The process can be that simple. Pretty delicious too.
I did just that for the longest time.
But then I took a peak Through the Nut Butter Looking Glass.
A little look — a glimpse — and a world of curiosity and certainty swirled together.
My interest inched me closer to the Looking Glass.
At the cost of firm footing.
’Til I stumbled then tumbled into the rabbit hole.
Much like ANYTHING you do, say, or think — small details come together to form big ideas.
Nut butter is no exception.
First the possibilities.
Option 1: SOAK nuts then DEHYDRATE them
soak nuts in salty water for many hours
drain soaked nuts and rinse them off
bake or dehydrate nuts for many more hours
Option 2: ROAST nuts
Place nuts in oven for short time
Option 3: SOAK, DEHYDRATE, and ROAST
Option 4: Avoid all extra processes
Toss nuts in machine and make butter
Option 5: Forget about it and just go buy nut butter
Why soak nuts just to dehydrate them again??
Well, here are a few reasons why nut-soakers say you should soak your nuts:
Soaking allows the nut (which is a plant seed) to begin the germination process.
Soaking simulates an environment where the nut is getting ready to do its job — sprout into a plant.
When the nut receives the signal to sprout, it experiences changes in its composition.
As with any seed that wants to succeed, its stored protein, starch, and oil kick in to feed the sprout.
Then you eat this little life and thrive from its bounty.
Soaking nuts brings PHYTIC ACID levels down.
Phytic acid is a plant compound that stores phosphorous and preserves the nut.
When you eat phytic acid it binds to minerals in your body (Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Zinc, Chromium, Manganese) and becomes PHYTATE.
Humans do not produce PHYTASE, the enzyme necessary to break phytate down.
Once a mineral is attached to phytic acid, it cannot be broken down and reabsorbed. It becomes waste.
As a result, phytic acid is dubbed an anti-nutrient.
Soaking nuts reduces enzymes inhibitors and goitrogens.
Enzyme inhibitors do as their name implies: inhibit enzymes that aid in your digestion.
The salt in the soaking solution is meant to neutralize the nut’s enzyme inhibitors.
Goitrogens, which are naturally occurring plant pesticides, may disrupt your thyroid function.
Soaking reduces the amount of goitogens in the nut.
Yeah.
Those are the many reasons why you should soak your nuts.
Always. Without fail.
BUT, one of the first studies I found, from 2018, claimed that soaking whole nuts pretty much does nothing.
To be sure, they chopped the nuts up and ran the test again.
As it turns out, the chopped-soaked nuts had a reduction in both phytates (bad) and the nut’s natural mineral content (good).
Soaking your nuts removes some of the bad stuff AND the good stuff.
So what’s the point of soaking nuts?
Then I decided to look into phytic acid. I wanted to understand why it’s been deemed an evil anti-nutrient.
Instead, I find that phytic acid is an extremely powerful antioxidant that may protect against cancer (study).
As an antioxidant, phytic acid binds to free radicals — free radicals that would otherwise roam free throughout your body, potentially causing dis-ease.
Phytic acid doesn’t stop fighting at cancer. It is known to prevent kidney stones and protects against diabetes mellitus, caries (cavities), atherosclerosis and coronary heart disease (study).
Suddenly, phytic acid doesn’t sound so bad anymore.
An antioxidant that’s going to help prevent kidney stones and cavities and heart issues? Maybe even cancer?
I definitely want that.
Does it come in pill form? Sure does.
It’s even beneficial in skincare. I had no idea. I mean, my personal skincare routine is a splash of clean, cold water.
Here’s why rabbit holes are fun — you’ll always discover something new and potentially useful.
Now I can connect with my local Sephora skincare professional.
Any cursory search can bring up black and white answers, but it isn’t until you hit the rabbit hole that the complexity of soaking your nuts becomes apparent.
For example, I found out that human beings actually DO produce phytase (the enzyme that breaks down phytate).
So even if a mineral attaches to phytic acid and becomes phytate, your microbiome can potentially still break it down and use the attached mineral. Also, when larger amounts of phytic acid are consumed, your microbiome adjusts to produce more bacteria ready to break it down (study).
And as you may have suspected, there are mixed reviews regarding the significance of enzyme inhibitors and goitrogens.
What the rabbit hole is suggesting — the human body is adaptable.
Now that you’ve made it here, ask yourself: Should I become a nut soaker?
Begin to answer this question by first determining how you feel after eating not-soaked nuts.
Since I can eat bowl after bowl of not-soaked nuts and feel great, maybe I’m not a great candidate for soaking my nuts.
But I wanted to give my body something new to work with and see if anything changed. Run an experiment.
When I tried soaking my nuts to see what it’s all about, I found that it didn’t affect me profoundly enough to become a committed nut soaker.
However, someone who experiences bloating or any kind of digestion issue when eating nuts might want to give soaking a try.
Some people have a very light allergy that can be aided by soaking, like this account.
Or maybe your enzyme production is low and there is a component that doesn’t break down sufficiently.
On the other hand —
Maybe you have too much iron floating around and the phytic acid would be helpful in demineralizing.
Maybe you eat nuts without other foods and the phytic acid can only effect the food being digested at that time.
Maybe you’re nutrient deficiency is a red flag that needs more attention than simply trying to change the chemistry of the food eaten.
There are so many different factors to consider; experimentation is imperative to finding your balance.
It’s easy to become overwhelmed by the endless small details pouring in Through the Looking Glass.
Not far behind overwhelm is frustration, and then it’s a matter of time before discouragement shows up.
But don’t forget — The devil is in the details.
The more you learn about something, the greater the number of questions you’ll have.
The cycle of wonder continues; fueled by answers that unfold into new questions.
This principle is like defending a PhD thesis — answer questions about your idea until all that’s left are new questions.
Curiosity is important.
It opens the doors headed for rabbit holes.
And carves out a way to discovery that is focused on who you are.
I greatly enjoy the process of not knowing, experimenting, and attempting to find an answer based on the information I’ve gathered.
It’s probably part of the reason why I do NOT enjoy following recipes.
Maybe it’s a result of my background in the sciences and the pleasure that experimentation has brought me.
Maybe it’s that I don’t like being told what to do.
This propensity toward curiosity has resulted in weird flavor combinations, varied final consistencies, and a willingness to eat all of my mistakes. Once you’re off the beaten path, it’s just a matter of choosing your direction. And what follows is delighted surprise or hilarious displeasure.
Playing around with nut butters has resulted in these realizations —
Certain nuts release oil more quickly than others.
The mixes I’ve made that were majority almond resulted in the fastest release of oil.
When the mixture seems too dry and you’re getting tired of food processing, just add an oil that accompanies the flavor. I like to add MCT (medium chain triglyceride) oil to my nut butters, but it can be coconut, walnut, avocado, olive, etc.
If you choose not to soak your nuts, at least toast them in the oven for 8-10 minutes.
Warming the nuts will add to the overall flavor (bolder, richer, nuttier? — is that redundant?).
The warmth from toasting the nuts makes the food processor’s job easier and the oil will release more quickly.
The butter can be made from a single nut (almond) or a combination (almond, walnut, macadamia, etc).
The power of your food processor/blender plays an important role.
A 10-cup Cuisinart food processor is going to make nut butter faster than a vintage Oster blender.
As you’ll see in the pictures that accompany the recipe, I added some seeds to the mix (sunflower, pepitas, hemp hearts).
The recipe below, however, is for a single nut butter.
But if you’re anything like me, get wild.
SOAKED NUT BUTTER
Ingredients
3 Cups Nut(s)
6 Cups Water
1 tsp of Salt
Directions
Place all ingredients in a large bowl and allow the nuts to soak for 8 hours.
Once soaking is completed, drain water and rinse nuts.
Place soaked nuts on baking sheet and bake at low temperature (100°F is ideal but not all ovens go that low).
My oven’s lowest temp is 150°F so I periodically released heat from the oven by opening the door.
Dehydrator is a great option as well. Should take about 8-10 hours to dry the nuts.
Once the nuts are crispy and dry (try one), place the warm nuts in a food processor or blender.
Begin processing or blending in 1-minute intervals.
Scrape the sides of the food processor/blender between each interval.
Add a pinch of salt for flavor.
Be patient. Keep repeating this process and doing your breathing exercises.
My 850 Watt food processor took about 15 minutes to make the nut butter.
Add a teaspoon of honey (or vanilla extract) to balance out any bitterness (optional).
Add a pinch of cinnamon or cardamom for added flavor (optional).
There is a general attempt to make everything in our lives black and white — a simplified version of reality.
It’s easier to avoid the rabbit holes and refuse the Looking Glass. Just trust what is said.
But only you know what it’s like to be YOU.
Only you can ask the necessary questions to unravel the riddles that ride along.
The human body is complex and adaptable. Within any single moment is a multitude of actions and reactions that result in your individual experience. Try making the search for what works a playful discovery of the countless possibilities.
Then take that inquisitive, open mind and see others through Your Looking Glass.
We are all trying to find our way. We are all searching for what might work for us and the ones we love.
And so rarely should the answers be presented in a neat black or white.
Although I have decided where I stand on one topic: I am not a nut soaker. Case closed.
Change Your Mind
When was the last time you changed your mind?
Maybe it was in deciding what to wear this morning or deciding to stay home instead of meeting friends.
Maybe it was something seemingly more impactful like moving in the direction of a new career or purchasing a new home.
Whatever the chosen change, it is good to be able to change your mind. Actually, change is one of the best things for us. Change keeps us challenged, helps us realize different kinds of potential, and flexes our brain’s ability to be maleable and develop new pathways (neuroplasticity). It is the first step of any individual improvement. Our ability to change is what has allowed human beings to progress into what we are today.
But it’s just as easy to get stuck in the negative emotions around altering a decision.
Doubts about the decision made.
Feelings of shame or embarrassment about the change.
Feeling unreliable.
All of these feelings have a common denominator: fear of the unknown.
The unknown can be seen through the lens of curiosity and wonder and amazement, resulting in a positive experience and heightened awareness.
Just as quickly, and with greater ease, the unknown can be seen through eyes of judgement: unworthiness.
Unworthiness can take on many forms — fear of shame, fear of failure, arrogance/hubris, etc. — and does little to serve us.
It may feel unavoidable at times, but doesn’t everything have a piece of the unknown in it?
The most destructive side of fear of the unknown is becoming your ideas.
We tend to become our ideas in order to avoid what we can achieve and what we desire — it’s a limit on your individual potential. It’s the easiest way to look at an unknown future, opt out, and guarantee the continued status quo. After all, the end result becomes known: nothing changes.
Here are some examples of becoming your ideas:
I’m not flexible, my body just can’t do that.
I’m not a good enough musician to release music.
Why would anyone be interested in my writing or perspective.
I’ve always been socially awkward and weird around people.
I didn’t go to high school/college so I’m not smart.
These kinds of ideas have a way of dragging you into a void that’s really difficult to get out of. One idea leads to another and all of a sudden there is little reason to move forward.
But there are things you can do to change this harsh critic into a more curious, adaptable being.
Here are a few useful practices to help change your mind.
CHALLENGE YOUR COMFORT ZONE
The first step to any change is to step out of what you already know and into the unknown. A step into discomfort is an opportunity to feel and discover something new. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable makes it easier for others to reach out and build a new connection. It reignites the desire to learn and explore, something all too many of us lose in the storm of life.
Discomfort offers glimpses into who you can be. It reaches into the recesses and pulls up the things you thought impossible or unattainable. Then the feeling becomes infectious - for yourself and others.
I have a morning ritual that involves a cold rinse for a minimum of 2 minutes. There are mornings when I look at that cold water and almost hate it. My skin begins to react to the cold droplets hitting it and my brain says “damn, that’s cold.” So I step in. I slow my breathing. I accept the cold. And the discomfort slowly dissolves. The icy cold becomes familiar.
A discomfort ritual to start the day. But this doesn’t have to be limited to physical discomfort.
Talk to someone new, even if it’s just to compliment them.
Start practicing that skill you’ve wanted to work on (guitar, drawing, writing, reading, meditating, etc.).
Buy something you’ve never bought before.
Take in new (read: not typical) information.
Dance!
2. TURN UP — SHOW UP
Once you’ve step out of your comfort zone, begin to hold yourself accountable. Don’t accept the many excuses the mind
provides and focus on the way you feel once you’ve completed something.
Go to the gym even when you’re feeling lazy. How do you feel after your workout?
Practice new skill when you’d rather not. What are your thoughts after completing your commitment?
Offer someone a compliment when you’d rather not reach out. How did that act of giving feel?
Accountability is one of the best confidence builders. It builds a natural desire for accomplishment that fuels an ongoing goal-setting, goal-completing cycle. The more you perform the task, the more you’ll want to perform it again. It’s the beginning of a habit or ritual.
This is also where you can begin to reflect on the limiting ideas that exist. In the moment you don’t want to go to the gym ask yourself — why don’t I want to go? Maybe it’s because you don’t want others to see you exercising. Or it might be that you don’t think there is enough time. Asking yourself why you don’t want to do something may offer greater insight into the ideas and thought patterns you’re looking to change.
3. FIND YOUR ANCHOR
Having an anchor offers grounding when you need it. It can be a person you call or a thought you have that takes you away
from any of the negative thoughts/patterns. It’s kind of a safe space when you’re feeling unbalanced or thrown off.
My anchor is one of absurdity. Whenever I’m caught up in thoughts of unworthiness I think about the fact that we’re on a rock that’s flying through space. This rock can be hit by another rock at any point in time, and this would bring an end to what I know as my world (as well as everyone else’s world). But while this rock floats through space I have the opportunity and privilege to love my friends, family, and self, while growing my capacity for thought, wonder, and connection.
My parents are a great example of individuals who continually challenge their comfort zone. As immigrants, they came to the United States with very little understanding of the country and its language. But they also came with buckets full of hope.
They used music, movies, and personal interactions as ways to continue learning English. Their curiosity and willingness to learn was rewarded with connection and opportunity.
But they didn’t just accept the success, pass the torch, and fall into complacency. Instead, my parents continue to show up and develop their English-language skills. My sister and I have been asked multiple times to continue correcting them because it’s the only way they’ll learn certain linguistic phrasings or idioms. And this desire to learn has rewarded them with the confidence to approach any subject and discuss it in their second language.
Now I have the pleasure of listening to my mother and father stand up for themselves in their non-native tongue. They continue to make mistakes and correct those mistakes. All in an attempt to communicate more freely and confidently.
And they continue to anchor one another because they’ve never stopped enjoying the challenges they face together.
Whenever you’re feeling stuck or stagnant or bored — make a change to your day.
Whenever the comfort zone calls with all its couches and snacks and loneliness — make a change to your day.
Change and challenge your mind. Offer yourself a bit of excitement each day.
And think about this giant, moving rock spinning through space and the countless opportunities and possibilities it offers.
For all the unknowns that plague us, there is a cherished known:
Life is for the living.
Mouthwash
Oral health doesn’t typically find itself among the hottest topics, but there is great value in understanding its positive effect throughout the body.
If you’ve ever experienced Chinese Medicine, whether it be acupuncture or herbalism or cupping, the practitioner probably asked to see your tongue. Actually, most physicians, whether naturopathic or not, will ask to see the patient’s tongue.
This is because many of our ailments, whether we know about them or not, are expressed through the mouth.
Good oral health varies for each individual, but the average routine is brush & floss twice daily.
I have gone to countless dentists, from professionals with many years of experience to new students in dental school, and rarely was I instructed on what the order to brush and floss actually meant.
For example, I was not instructed on the proper way to brush my teeth with a traditional toothbrush until I was in my 20’s. I’m sure I wasn’t doing a bad job, but a little instruction may have prevented some cavities or other issues.
Just the same, I was not instructed on proper flossing technique until about the same time.
And to be fair, maybe I just wasn’t listening. But as someone who has spent most of his adult life uninsured, I do everything I can to prevent damage, especially costly dental damage.
Regardless of where the blame lies, one thing that has DEFINITELY not been covered by any of my dental experts is mouthwash or mouth rinse.
Recent studies have pointed to the negative effects of chlorhexidine mouthwash (Ex: Peridex, Perio-Aid, Halita) on mouth microbiome health (article). In the study researchers found that the chlorhexidine increased lactate-producing bacteria, which lowered the pH of the saliva (creating a more acidic environment). The lowered pH, along with lowered microbiome diversity, may increase the risk of tooth damage.
Furthermore, antiseptic mouthwash (alcohol-based, Ex: Listerine, Breath-Rx, generic antiseptic mouthwash) plays a negative role in blood pressure regulation when mouthwash is used before AND after exercise.
A University of Plymouth study showed that participants using an antiseptic mouthwash before exercise had no change in nitrite levels after exercise, while participants who rinsed with water experienced elevated levels of nitrite after exercise.
What the hell?
Your body circulates digested nitrate from foods such citrus, leafy greens, and dark chocolate. Some of these circulating nitrates are released through the salivary glands. Beneficial bacteria in the mouth’s microbiome reduce the nitrate into nitrite. The nitrite then reacts with enzymes in the body to produce NITRIC OXIDE. Nitric oxide plays a key role in many different functions throughout the body.
Check out the chart below and imagine your life without it.
So, in the study, by using the antiseptic mouthwash and eliminating some of the microbiome, the remaining beneficial bacteria in the mouth were unable to properly convert nitrate to nitrite — resulting in lower nitric oxide levels after exercise.
If the goal of dental hygiene is to promote oral and whole-body health, then the use of antiseptic mouthwash is counterproductive.
Similarly, participants who first exercised and then rinsed with an antiseptic mouthwash experienced a 60% decrease in nitrite production within the first hour of recovery. After two hours their bodies completely stopped nitrite production.
This means the bacteria in your mouth have direct influence on the reactions that occur throughout your body!
And it gets wilder!
Improper nitric oxide production can even result in metabolic disorders such as diabetes (study).
The importance of the microbiome throughout our bodies cannot be overstated.
It is critical to understand that the microbiome has an ACTIVE RELATIONSHIP with its host (study). How you decide to treat your microbiome may play a direct role in how you feel and function. And sometimes we must suffer with our microbiome when a surprise hits — like the drinking water in Ecuador.
After ingesting some local water on a salad, my sister and I proceeded to suffer from intense diarrhea. Our microbiomes were not prepared for the new intruders, and the intruders were given about 2 weeks to wreak havoc before being tamed.
Nearing the end of the first week, a week filled with tales of near disaster and untellable embarrassment, I went to a local pharmacy to see what options they had to offer.
The pharmacist’s English was malo and my Spanish was terrible, so we communicated in a variety of ways. He brought out a small box with a single pill. He pretended to swallow the pill and followed his esophagus down to his stomach, then made an exploding noise while opening his arms.
Taking the pill will destroy ALL of your microbiome, he signaled.
I decided to skip nuking my guts and instead suffered another week of unsureness and situational panic.
Besides, the close-calls that create stress and discomfort during the trip become tales of honest humor once looked back on.
Weeks later, once our microbiomes had recovered and we could begin laughing about the experience, we met a traveler who took the gut bomb. She said her experience with diarrhea and discomfort was similar to ours and she didn’t want it to ruin her trip, so she took the pill.
Apparently it worked too well.
She confessed that under the same circumstances she would never take it again.
After the microbiome destruction she became more sensitive to foods that did not previously effect her, felt her sleep disturbed, and suffered from a lower level of energy throughout the day.
She was doing her best to encourage biome regrowth by eating probiotics, exercising, resting throughout the day, etc, but her body couldn’t speed through the process.
She didn’t feel back to herself until a couple months after the micro-massacre.
Her body’s reaction makes a lot of sense: the communication and processing it understood was cut off. It had to rebuild the many pathways that serve both known and unknown purposes.
Since our microbiome is present to help us function optimally, it seems fitting to take care of it in any way possible.
For me it was accepting the fear of crapping my pants everywhere I went throughout Ecuador and Peru, just to give that microbiome the time it needed to bounce back into balance.
A much simpler and more peaceful way to begin taking care of your microbiome is by making your own mouthwash.
I enjoy rinsing with salt because it is the most recommended method of oral maintenance, old and new.
My mother always recommends salt rinses for toothaches and sore throats, and when my wisdom teeth were removed I was instructed by my oral surgeon to salt rinse at least twice a day to encourage wound healing.
Here and here are a couple articles focused on the positive influence salt rinses have on oral health. In addition to faster wound healing, salt rinses prevent bacterial plaque and, most importantly, DO NOT attempt to eliminate the entire microbiome.
What you’ll need for 16 oz of mouthwash:
1 teaspoon Salt (Himalayan Pink Salt)
Water (Distilled or Reverse Osmosis)
Essential Oils (optional) - Be sure to use essential oils that are approved for topical and oral use
8 drops Frankincense
6 drops Tea Tree
6 drops Wintergreen
Optional — Add a teaspoon of baking soda for added whitening and to neutralize pH.
STEP 1
Pour salt and drop essential oils into container. Fill 1/4 of container with hot (boiled) water.
STEP 2
Mix the container so most of the salt dissolves.
STEP 3
Fill the remainder of the bottle with room temperature water.
Use about 1/2 an ounce per rinse.
Use this mouthwash whenever brushing your teeth or when you’d like to freshen your breath.
It also helps heal canker sores or fresh inner-cheek bites (the worst!).
Most importantly, enjoy taking care of the wondrous bacterial world that exists within you.
Wretched Resolutions
Four weeks into the New Year is a great time to check in on Your resolution.
Is it easy to focus on and work toward Your resolution?
Has it felt good to work on it or is there resistance?
Does the challenge You’re facing ever feel overwhelming, maybe impossible?
The beginning of any change is the creation of new relationships.
It involves restructuring a piece of Your world and actively returning to nurture the change into habit.
And the way You relate to the task sets the tone for the entire accomplishment.
Martin Buber wrote a wonderful book called I and Thou (read: I and You), and in it he highlights the two major types of relationships human beings make use of:
I/IT - Subject/Object (Unidirectional)
I/THOU - Subject/Subject (Reciprocal)
Each one comes with a different kind of potential.
You navigate the world through Your senses (I-It relationships).
The majority of Your daily life is consumed by I-It relationships that help gather knowledge to understand the world.
That knowledge is then taken and applied to relationships with other humans (I-It relationship).
But sometimes You see the other person in front of you as a whole being (I-Thou).
You recognize them as an equal (I-Thou).
It is very easy to get caught up in the simplicity of I-It relationships and allow them to run ALL potential relationships in Your life. But this will prevent depth and nuance from entering any/all future interpersonal relationships.
I-Thou relationships require much more of us.
It is an effort to explore and understand things larger than self.
To search Your self through others, and see others through Your self.
Most importantly, it is an active decision to relate in a certain way.
We have the ability to choose how we want to see others and which relationships are deserving of our time.
Just the same, Your relationship with the goal You’d like to achieve directly influences how You feel and accomplish it.
If each trip to the gym is a battle, then the entire process will feed the feeling of war.
If the achievement is always in the distance and only reached at the very end, then the endless journey continues and staying motivated may become a challenge.
If the resolution reaches into feelings of unworthiness, then overwhelm will take the task and build walls of impossibility.
Someone like David Goggins finds toughness and drive to be great tools for accomplishment.
And Goggins has a resume to match.
He is an endurance athlete who has completed some of the most brutal races.
He also holds the Guinness World Record for number of pull ups completed in 24 hours — 4,030
But this style of training is what Goggins knows as a retired Navy SEAL.
He’s a great example of the extremes some are willing to face.
But not everyone will find a relentless, unforgiving attitude as the best motivator.
Some require kindness to find the relationship that’s right for the goal.
Can You be a David Goggins? Yes, absolutely.
Is it just a matter of setting a resolution and completing it? Absolutely not.
Training to be an endurance athlete involves body and mind preparation.
In order to get ready for something so difficult it is necessary to be able to relate to the goal. Without understanding the physical and mental demand, one cannot be ready.
So to move forward on a big goal it is best to break it down into many smaller goals.
The smaller steps are easier to follow and measure. And feeling progress feels good.
Each step is the beginning of a relationship that is nurtured in the direction of habit.
This allows You to learn something new, feel the progress and make any necessary adjustments, then form a habit once it’s familiar.
It also allows your brain and body to enjoy some success neurotransmitters: dopamine, endorphins, serotonin, and oxytocin.
And even Your relationship with each hormone can be considered and manipulated for best results.
Dopamine is that rush of pleasure You feel after buying all that new fitness equipment or signing up for a gym membership.
Spending money is fun and feels good. Focused on more short-term (pleasure-reward), dopamine may motivate You into addictive behavior (eating sugar, shopping, etc.).
Whereas serotonin’s presence is mainly in the gut and majorly focused on appetite, metabolism, and overall gut function (study, study).
This is an over-simplification of a complex system (dopamine and serotonin have their OWN relationship), but the relationship You have with these neurotransmitters may influence the next decision made.
If You tend to give in to pleasure and seek to spike dopamine instead of gradually investing in it, then waiting for any long-term effects will be difficult.
But, if your resolution is broken down into smaller steps with smaller releases of dopamine after each accomplished goal, then the body begins to develop a new relationship with the neurotransmitter.
Everything we do contains within it a myriad of relationships.
A better understanding of these relationships helps focus energy and intent.
As an example, I am learning how to do a ring muscle up this year.
This is a great challenge for me because there are many small steps I need to take before I can complete the resolution.
And these smaller steps highlight the necessary order to complete the resolution. Each step is a separate relationship.
Train grip strength/new grip (false grip) — learn a new way to hold onto something
As grip strength develops, increase wrist flexibility
Once grip and wrist strength are increased, begin training core stability
Finally, shoulder strength and stability will allow for the muscle up movement to be completed.
At no point may I skip a step.
Each part is integral to the whole, and without each step there is risk of injury or inability to complete.
And nurturing each step/relationship offers a timeline for completion — smaller habits coming together for the greater movement.
The average time it takes to form a habit is 66 days (depending on previous experience).
Taking tiny steps incorporates a bit of practice with pacing and patience, qualities that strengthen over time.
Imagine completing Step 1 out of 15 of your resolution, feeling some chemical success in dopamine, and patiently proceeding to Step 2.
This is why everything worth doing takes time.
After a few days of grip training I can feel what strength and flexibility is lacking in my wrists and hands.
It has yet to become a habitual movement because the muscle strength is still developing and the nervous system (somatic) is still becoming familiar with the new movement.
My nervous system is gradually learning and memorizing the movement.
It’s working on and slowly building the muscle memory relationship.
AGAIN, I have to be patient. I have to be kind to my body and take the proper steps to prevent injury and enjoy success.
Using this tactic of smaller goals also creates a cushion in case something changes or doesn’t go your way.
Even if You don’t make it to Your resolution, You will have accomplished a long list of goals.
Many of which are the beginnings of new habits.
And changing Your mind about a resolution looks a lot different once You’ve completed a laundry list of tasks and formulated new relationships, only to realize the resolution isn’t worth the time or effort or risk.
I might work my way up to the shoulder part of my muscle up journey only to discover that my shoulder is unable to complete the task. Then I will be faced with a new goal - unlock shoulder issue that limits my abilities - and the journey of goal setting begins again.
Most importantly, the incomplete resolution does not translate into failure.
It is the accomplishment of many smaller, useful goals
Realization of inability/individual limitation
Refocusing to continue growing
If my shoulder is the limiting factor then the goal temporarily shifts to rehabilitating the shoulder.
Then, in the future, the ring muscle up can be reconsidered.
Resolutions may be a fun way to think about Your potential and what may be accomplished in the coming year, but the actions necessary are much different.
Take Your resolution and tear it apart into its main components.
Each component is a relationships that needs a certain kind of attention.
Take Your time and be patient when forming habits from these relationships.
Enjoy the rewards offered by the body.
Keep growing. Stay wild.
Gratitude
Imagine an old woman.
She smiles constantly.
As she enters her kitchen she greets the family.
No one answers back.
As she cooks she tells her children how smart and successful they are.
Both grand and great.
Shares the hopes she holds for a life of health and happiness.
Wishes of protections and preventions.
The taste of boiling, salted water touches her tongue.
Yet only sweet nothings pour from her mouth.
The way she rubbed a tiny hand through the bars of the crib to help you fall asleep.
Or when she reached for a diaper too late and laughed as the wall wetted.
The time her handsome, virile husband flew over oceans to spend the year with you.
And how her heart bursts with joy each time you visit and aches with longing once you’re gone again.
The food she prepares changes form, but her love is constant.
She shares the meal and washes the dishes.
As she leaves the kitchen she kisses her hand and places it on each of the photographs.
Her overflowing heart ready for tomorrow.
This is one of my grandmother’s gratitude rituals. Not a day goes by that those pictures of her grand and great-grand -children do not receive her radiance.
The first time I noticed this habit I thought she was talking to herself in the kitchen.
Followed by — my grandmother is losing her mind.
Fortunately, she is simply expressing her appreciation for the ones she loves. She is being grateful.
This may be part of the reason why, at 92, she continues to smile and laugh through the hardships of age.
It is very easy to find countless articles and research projects explaining why gratitude is such a useful tool in daily life.
Gratitude helps us focus on positive emotions and step away from the grips of negative ones.
These positive thoughts begin to encourage the body to rest more peacefully and turn down inflammation processes.
Gratitude grows the desire to physically exercise. It gears the mind toward optimism.
It’s a pro-social behavior and helps to connect us.
Best of all, gratitude is cyclical — receiving gratitude is just as important as giving it.
We tend to bring up gratitude when faced with the holidays. And slowly it fades amongst the stresses of the year.
Like Valentine’s Day or Sweetest Day, or t-shirts that read Just Be Nice — by not making these important gestures daily habits we’re ignoring something perpetually useful and good.
We’re ignoring who we want to be for the many distractions daily life may offer.
Next time something someone is wearing catches your eye, compliment them.
Say Please and Thank You even if it seems redundant or tedious.
Keep a journal of all the many different things you are grateful for and go out into the world with a desire to keep adding to the list.
I enjoy a morning gratitude ritual to begin each day:
As my eyes open I begin to thank the Sun for the warmth I will feel from it.
I thank the Earth for the softness of its soil and the smells in the air.
I take a deep breath and thank my body for its willingness to work hard and be cared for.
And I thank my grandmother for keeping me close, even when we’re oceans apart.
Buttered Up
Here is a truly wonderful reason to give thanks during your celebration this month: homemade butter.
It is awfully easy and endlessly fun to experiment with butter for exciting new flavors.
All that’s required is a food processor (or mixer), heavy cream, and about 10 minutes.
STEP 1: Pour the heavy cream into the food processor or mixer.
STEP 2: Watch the heavy cream turn into whipped cream. This should take 1-2 minutes.
STEP 3: Allow the food processor to continue working and the whipped cream will begin to thicken and clump together more.
STEP 4: Continue to work the slowly forming clumps until there is a separation of butter and buttermilk.
STEP 5: Pour the buttermilk out of the food processor. Work the butter until buttermilk stops forming.
— Save the buttermilk for biscuits —
STEP 6: Put butter on everything.
It’s also fun to try out different flavor combinations.
Personal favorite: 1/2 cup blueberry — zest of 1 lemon — honey.
With self-control, refrigerated homemade butter should last 1-2 week.
Give thanks to your loved ones with homemade butter!!
Oh, The Horror
The month of October comes with so many different things to enjoy. The fall season has its color-changing charm and leaf piles to jump into. Pumpkin spice everything is available. And the grips of suspense come for us as slashers and monsters and clowns.
As there are many different types of horror, so too exist a multitude of ways to appreciate the genre. Some chase the euphoric rush of hormones and neurotransmitters flooding the body. Others seek to discuss and consider what comes alive with a word like evil. Yet others simply find entertainment in the whole thing.
Horror has become a fundamental part of my life because it is a symbol of connection. It is where, from an early age, I bonded with others and, together, we pushed our boundaries. I still see Stephen King’s Pennywise every time I eat chocolate ice cream — it’s what my friend’s aunt found appropriate accompaniment to a cannibalistic clown living in the sewer. I feel that windy, sleepless sleepover night when a chainsaw revs and Leatherface pops into my mind’s eye.
And it makes me want more.
Stepping into your fears opens windows of uncertainty and doors of anxiety. Each dark corner houses the personal terrors that daily life does well to avoid. And the dark recesses willingly lie in wait until your curiosity persuades a step into the shadows.
The simplified explanation of the pleasures that come with horror is the activation of fight or flight (amygdala). This survival response excites the body. That’s why it feels good. But brain scans show a different story. A much more synergistic one.
In a 2009 study researchers showed that many different parts of the brain light up when engaging in horror, not just the amygdala. The visual cortex, insular cortex, thalamus, and dorsal medial prefrontal cortex, all show activity — areas of the brain heavily focused on sensation and arousal states.
A 2016 study and 2020 study both found that anticipatory fear increases brain connectivity. So all those areas lighting up when you’re scared or anxious are working together to figure out the impending obstacle.
Thought-provoking.
A 2021 study even showed that horror fans were more psychologically resilient during the pandemic.
It’s even been shown that watching psychologically stressful movies boosts immune response and immune cell production (study).
It’s as if the body is mindful of the positive influence of horror in our lives.
But the truly challenging horrors we must face sometimes come to us faceless and bodyless. It is not what’s in the darkness but the darkness itself. It’s not what might be watching you, but the sight of yourself that’s chilling.
Mindful meditation is a wonderful way to take the challenges of archetypal horror and begin to feel them differently. But even the things we so confidently call positive and helpful have a companion shadow to match.
On her blog My Spiritual Shenanigans, Vasundhra goes through different ways meditation may result in something scary.
Seeing and/or hearing things
Body behaving weirdly — ears ringing, heat release
Uncontrollable subconscious thoughts
Feeling more lost
Potentially feeling “it” — fortunately, not the sewer-dwelling clown.
The consistency between all the potential negative results is a lack of control. And what is horror, terror, fright, but a lack of control?
We have done well to control so many different things outside our self that the challenges within bring forward new faces of dis-ease. These new faces stay in old houses: fear, anxiety, depression, anger, disgust, etc.
So it would seem that mindful meditation and horror work in similar ways to confront uncertainty and discomfort. Both spotlight anticipation in order to better understand what now means.
The biological connection between horror and meditation is in the act of shutting the brain down. Like with meditation, experiencing something scary causes the brain’s activity centers to “shut down,” and begin to hyper-focus (study).
Ironically, the most frequent complaint about meditation is I can’t turn my mind off — admitting a struggle to stay in the moment (now). A wonderfully easy way to excuse yourself from the table of self-reflection.
Maybe that’s a mechanism of self-preservation: the brain doesn’t want to give up control because the unknown is perceived as worse than the current, known state. Or is it your self that doesn’t want to give up control and conveniently blames the mind in a sort of Jekyll-Hyde struggle?
Instead, it’s more fun to take the opportunity and usefully apply morbid fascinations.
Embrace a few extremes and see how it feels. Sit in the discomfort and navigate it using what you know. Finding ways of relating to the unfamiliar through discovery is how we learn and grow.
I began experimenting with horror movies because I found myself among those that enjoyed being scared. And this feeling grew inside me. I listened to extreme music because we wanted to see how far our assumptions about music held and when they began to dissolve. And the boundaries continue to expand.
Through this lens I observed the extremes of life and death via movies and music. I thought about mortality and brutality. I thought about what things may come from the darkness, and I wondered why we keep housing our antagonists in those depths. And why the most notable darkness - the eternal peace each of us avoids for as long as we possibly can - continues to stalk and laugh at the futility of our attempts.
Abbath of Immortal fame
All of these ideas have boiled down to one thing: All Things Must Pass.
What horror does more elegantly than any other genre is to play with the duality that we face as living, thinking beings.
The initial scare (negative) that causes one to jump is followed by a release of adrenaline and dopamine (positive).
To improve one’s fear-response is to allow something to scare you (ie. by being more vulnerable you become less vulnerable).
For there to be comfort there must be discomfort. To be certain is to accept uncertainty.
And sometimes it reaches into the depths of emotion to see where the line is drawn. To ask where your limit is and what you’re willing to learn about this life. And its wisdom is not always welcome.
To love is to know the greatest loss.
The fruit of Life may only be alongside the decay of Death.
My exploration of the dark and grim has allowed me to laugh and smile, together with others, at the horror that is a paradoxical life. It has given me comfort in the things I cannot know and a willingness to explore that which I can.
Most importantly, it has allowed humor to bleed into the devouring ground beneath me so that when it’s my time to look back on the moment lived, it won’t be a scream or a whimper that sees me out, but an unquestionable laugh at the absurdity of it all.
Pumpkin Bumpkin
Pumpkin and the spices of fall are all around. Making a pumpkin puree opens a world of possibility. Try it, it’s incredibly simple.
ROASTED PUMPKIN — Pumpkin Puree
Preheat oven at 400 degrees.
Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
Cut your pumpkin in half and deseed it (save seeds if desired).
Place pumpkin cut-side down on the baking sheet.
Put in oven for 45-60 minutes, or until it looks like this…
Take the skin off and place all of the “meat” of the pumpkin into a food processor.
Add any desired spices (cinnamon, clove, nutmeg, etc) or keep it neutral for a soup or baking recipe.
The puree is good in the refrigerator for about a week or you can freeze it for months (maybe years, but why?).
What to do with all this puree?? Here are some really simple suggestions.
Pumpkin Chia Seed Pudding
Pumpkin Pie Smoothie
Oatmeal Pumpkin Cookies
Pumpkin Muffins
My favorite pumpkin use is for a soup or stew. The heated stew joins with the warming spices of cinnamon, nutmeg, and clove, so well. Ginger and lemon can be added for additional aroma and liveliness of flavor.
Here is a great pumpkin stew recipe. I would replace any broth with bone broth for added fat content to get through the winter!
Haven’t made bone broth before? Here is a great recipe, walk through, and background on why you may want to consider it.
Here at Wildmoon we like to celebrate with tea and tisane. The pumpkin spices are so easily embraced in a warm cup. Try this mixture next time you’re sitting down to read a book, curling up for a movie, or warming the belly for a gentle night of rest.
Pumpkin Spice Red Tea
1 tsp Rooibos tea
1/2 tsp Cinnamon Bark (crushed or whole)
1/2 tsp Clove (crushed)
2-3 Cardamom Seed Pods
Pinch Dried Ginger or Freshly Grated Ginger
Pinch Spearmint (sweeter) or Peppermint (minty)
Meet the Tribe: Hannah
Hannah is the owner/operator behind Wildmoon Alchemy. Her helping, healing hands and personality have many different outlets here, including: massage therapy, Reiki, herbal concocting, body care production, community building events, and so much more.
But most noticeable about where Hannah has been are the smiles. She leaves a trail of joy everywhere she goes.
She shares her wisdom in order to gain more. A life-long learner with a dedication to continue exploring the possibilities. In moments of hesitation or shakiness, Hannah is a force for belief and courage. She is the endless potential energy that holds its position relative to others.
A continuous force of magnetism and electricity. She is our Wild Moon.
What inspired you to open Wildmoon Alchemy?
I’ve been practicing massage therapy for over 12 years now and have always dreamt of running my own practice. I’ve always had an entrepreneurial spirit and couldn’t resist the incredible opportunity that was being given me here.
The tea side of things came a little later as life brought me new lessons. Experiencing the full benefits of herbs during a time of deep healing inspired me deeply; I just had to share them with everyone!
How does your business play into your vision for the Castle Rock community?
To promote well-being, peace, and holistic living is truly an honor. We have such a great community here, with lots of people seeking a more natural way to support their health. I love hearing their success stories and how they’re able to help others in turn!
Our refill station really means a lot to me too. Knowing that we’ve helped others reduce waste and ease some stress on the planet is such an awesome thing.
What direction is Wildmoon Alchemy headed?
There’s some magic being brewed, I’ll give you that! Having Beth join our soul collective has brought so much positive energy and growth. We’re looking forward to serving our community more through massage, retreats and workshops, and of course, lots of delicious tea!
How do you stay current with diet, fitness, wellness trends, etc?
Most often I find myself getting curious about some random thing and going down a rabbit hole. The herbs inspire a lot of that! And I hear things from clients as they share their health journey with me. From there, it really becomes a lot of self-exploration to see what’s worth sticking to! Trends will come and go, but the foundations of health have always been the same.
How do you keep your sunny, positive disposition day in and day out?
Practicing what I preach certainly helps! Consistent and quality movement. Organic and nourishing foods. Meditation and gratitude. Spending time with loved ones and belly rubs for Luna. I feel very fortunate for the life I live, and even better that I get to share the joy!
What does "being of service" mean to you?
It means showing up and doing whatever needs to be done with an open heart and pure intent. It means stepping out of yourself and being present for someone else. There’s no expectation for the favor to be returned, just gratitude.
What wisdom has come from the process of building a business?
Oh goodness. I still feel like I’m learning everyday!
The greatest wisdom, I think, has come from learning to really trust myself. I am led by intuition and speaking up for that hasn’t always been easy. I had to dig my heels in a couple times and I’m so glad I did! My intuition keeps me centered on the true purpose of the work.
I don’t have any formal training in business management so there have certainly been humbling moments. A lot of wisdom in knowing when to ask for help too!
Ultimately, it’s been a heart-led process.
What is the greatest intention you live by?
To leave things better than I found them. To ease another’s burdens and fill them with peace and joy. To uplift and renew.
Using a single word, what is most important in life?
Of course it has to be love. When love is at the root of things, beauty grows. It softens the harsh edges and gives acceptance for whatever challenges we may face. It connects us at a soul level. It is the greatest gift, to love and be loved.
Sip the Scales: Libra Blend
Fall is a time to enjoy change and prepare for more to come. When the crunching leaves underfoot are accompanied by pumpkins and warming spices. A call to accept a dimming season, slowing down, until finally it sleeps.
Our deciduous friends shed a colorful layer as we begin to embrace more. The cooler air, breathed deeply, revives the lungs after a long, heated summer. And the sooner darkening days leave our blazing star chased and desired, not evaded and avoided.
It is also a time of warm hands and bellies filled with tea and tisane.
Wildmoon Alchemy celebrates Libra.
Now, a time to balance. Follow the routine reminder of each day steadily halved into light and dark. When we take time and focus on that which may be tipping the scales and, instead, find harmony.
Libra is an earthy blend that ends on a high-note of spearmint. The sweetness of the star anise aids the bitter ending of dandelion. The rosebud smooths and sweetens the red clover and marshmallow root. This blend will warm and refresh the tastebuds. Enjoy!
Ingredients
Rooibos
Red clover
Dandelion
Marshmallow root
Star anise
Rosebuds
Spearmint
Better Believe
The teenage metalhead inside has been brought out by the likes of Salem, MA. Words of cleansing and blood for a time of wonder and unknown. In the familiar tropes of horror and kitsch-filled theme stores lies the philosophy of dark art and black magic.
The aforementioned young man was given Marilyn Manson and Columbine alongside puberty and reflection. The ideas of the dark arts made sense to the religious resistance building within. The blatant rejection of something so revered was alluring.
I am blessed to have had supporting parents who, though I was made to attend church, encouraged me to explore religion and spirituality. Visiting temples and discussing why’s and why not’s was expansive. It led to asking deeper and deeper and more and more until finally coming full circle.
That searching boy came full circle in Salem.
Statue of Roger Conant outside of Salem Witch Museum.
Salem’s visitor guide recommends a hodgepodge of witchy shops, and we began to visit them. While taking in a store, I flipped through the many possibilities of the town. One presence struck harder than all the others — The Satanic Temple.
As much as the aesthetic of witchy-ness appeals to me, Satanism is attractive for the words it put to ideas. It captured a way I wanted to relate to the world that no other doctrine had before, except science.
Satanic Rules of the Earth - Church of Satan
The impermanence of life and how to savor the experience.
An honesty filled with freedom and willingness instead of obligation.
And a desire to deeply know yourself, as only you can, in order to become helpful to the rest of the world.
Most importantly, I didn’t find the ideologies of politics tainting the clarity. This was bigger than politics. Its aim was the development of character. To try on ideas, gauge their compatibility, and not become them (to become them is for the ego).
So I took from Satanism the wisdom to be applied in life. Believe in yourself. Change yourself. Be true to yourself.
This is done without focus on the ego. Without arrogance or sureness. Something like that really makes sense to the young, reflecting mind. It calls to the dark place that needs a mirror to bounce a little light its way.
Through a dark art, so much light.
Naturally, when I discovered Salem, MA to be the home of The Satanic Temple I became excited. Typically, institutions don’t get much of anything going within me, but this one seemed worth a visit. Onward to the temple.
The street leading to the temple is littered with suburban-looking houses and apartments huddled side-by-side, as if crowding out of fear. An opening finally comes once the congestion meets a black gate and parking lot. A demand for territory by this imposing, Victorian structure.
What beauty. A display of power and presence. With a history to match: its past life was lived as a funeral home.
Full of excitement, we pull into the parking lot only to notice a gatekeeper before the door: requirements for entry.
I do not meet these requirements.
So many expletives and criticisms circulated throughout my head and heart. I felt baited and betrayed. Deceived by those whom my beliefs and understandings could align. The sting of the trick and no treat.
After a bit of complaining I came to a realization: life never stops pushing and shoving and testing every limit. It will constantly ask of you can you handle this? and the decision is yours.
It will ask if you can handle inconveniences and annoyances that wear and tear but aren’t meant to break. Or deal slight misfortunes to fuel judgements and hatreds that attempt to explain randomness.
Life will hand you heartache and heartbreak to see if you are willing to love more or if the pain isn’t worth another sacrifice.
An invaluable axiom for all to adopt is to set aside judgement. To look at something for what it is. I came to this temple thinking I already knew what it is, that I could assume what to expect. I was wrong.
I came expecting an apolitical institution focused on individualism. A place where all are accepted and respected and welcome. All the glories of what Satanism meant to me within a building. This is not what I found.
And I have no one but myself to blame for this. The responsibility of my assumption is mine and mine alone. So life asked me: are you ready to face the many people out there who disagree with your choice and will not associate with you for it?
I wonder why individuals become their ideas. What value does this provide? And the reflecting begins again.
What was once focused on the looming lords of the sky, reduces its scope to the righteous and holy tribe(s) claiming to have the answer. The black and white that dismiss every shade of grey for not having chosen either definite side. But the riches of the golden road are found in the middle.
I remember having a conversation with my father once and asking him why he believes in a god. He told me: I need something to believe in.
I respect the depth of such honesty. It’s a moment I have the privilege of cherishing.
But there is a sort of longing when I consider believing something based on a need. It feels paralyzed. As though the power given is crushing, so better surrendered. It does not seek out the light, instead, it assumes it.
My assumptions humble me with the truths they reveal. Then I can begin to see reasons why something is needed. It is why I desire to lead by example and uphold myself to the highest standard. To seek out the god within myself. And thrive as my highest self, sharing this dynamic being with all who welcome it.
There is more to learn than rage and disgust when faced with rejection. It is an opportunity to play with uncertainty and uncover the nature of duality. A time to see that one thing exists to give rise to its opposite. In polarity there is the creation of divide, but there is also the battle for balance.
So I move forward knowing that most of the world around me is unknown. The thoughts and feelings each one outside of me possesses are uncharted. And this extends out into the aimless darkness forever. An unstable terrain with strange secrets and exotic mysteries.
And the hunt for stable ground continues. But why is the thought of solid ground so enticing when most of us just want to fly?
Maybe in order to fly into darkness there is a requirement to survive — one must listen.
My endless questions have infinite answers. And the darkness becomes more welcoming. My lack of answer provides mystery. And the darkness more enticing. Onward we move in an attempt to better know ourselves, only to find that the darkness carries with it questions for questions for questions.
Flying blind has never been this much fun.
Northeast Kind
Recent travels in New York, Vermont, and New Hampshire have allowed for brief, subtle interactions that resulted in wonderful opportunities. When traveling it’s easy to hop on a phone or computer and begin to form an idea of what is possible and desired in the visited area, but the locals always seem to have the most satisfying recommendations.
The Adirondacks in New York has countless places to camp. The many lakes make for wonderful loop hikes that may end with a swim in the cool water. And sometimes a wander around a section of forest will lead to a lake with a random canoe that implores an ask for forgiveness instead of permission.
And how does one find these places? It may be possible using keywords and technology, but talking to the folks around may yield a more enjoyable experience.
A stop at a paid camping site addressed the question of where some primitive camping may be found. Instead of just the one spot discovered online, the recommendation came with three different suggestions.
Pulling into one of the suggested areas near Lake Durant, it quickly became clear that the limited campsites were very desirable (arrived on a Sunday and all the spaces were occupied). It’s never clear when someone is leaving, so it’s always worth the time to ask how long someone plans on being there. We walked over to the group and asked: all week. But the question brought with it an opening for suggestion.
One of the campers walked us over to the water’s edge and pointed to an opening in the trees — I saw a couple tents right over there this morning.
The smallest suggestion is all the convincing required to inspire a further look into what might be possible. We walked back to the car and began to ready our things for a short hike in toward the campsite. As we prepared, a couple gathering kindling walked by and started up a conversation. We told them about the recommended spot and Dan offered to show us how to get there. If he hadn’t had so much equipment, he would have claimed this spot as his own, but alas.
He walked us over and told us of the time he’s spent maintaining trails and guiding hikes. A nature enthusiast through-and-through. And a wonderful human to interact with. He showed us the site and expressed a playful jealousy, then walked back to his site. As we stood on the large rock beginning with the fire pit and ending in the water, it became clear we lucked out: this is the spot.
Lake Durant — Adirondacks of New York.
Would we have found this spot without interacting with these individuals? Maybe, but it would not have come with such ease and pleasant cooperation. There is a joy that comes with interactions that share and welcome. A solidarity of mindset — we’re out here together.
The next couple of days took us into Vermont and, somehow, the recommendations resulted in more magic. Much like any small city, Burlington, Vermont is fun to walk around or explore the beaches of Lake Champlain, but the forests yield the truly exciting stuff.
Lake Champlain — Burlington, VT
After a beach day on Lake Champlain, the forest began to call. Evening drives typically mean that a campsite will not be found for that night, but that doesn’t mean the morning wake happens without occasion. Headed east from Burlington, Stowe is a quick, one-hour drive. We used the mountains as a guide and found a parking lot to spend the night at Smuggler’s Notch near Mount Mansfield.
The sunrise was met with many more cars parking and preparations for hiking. We noticed a state park booth open with a young woman crocheting, so we decided to ask her advice for the day. She recommended Sterling Pond for our day-hike, told us about the scavenger hunt the park organized, shared a freshly made cookie from a local bakery, and told us where to find a spring for the freshest water.
As one may assume, the cookie was fantastic, the spring water refreshing, and the hike around the pond both beautiful and exhilarating — the water was brisk yet welcoming.
Sterling Pond - Stowe, VT
We appreciated the recommendations so much we had to ask one final question: where should we go for primitive camping? The answer flowed like water from a spring — Cottonbrook Road. So we headed to Cottonbrook in search of a site for the night. It didn’t take long to find a spot where a river flowed below and the sky opened above. A crackling fire accompanied by a gentle river as the soundtrack to stargazing.
Cottonbrook Road — Stowe, VT
The following morning was met with fresh coffee at a local shop. A quick look at a map showed Groton State Park as close by and full of accessible forest. We stopped at the Boulder Beach booth and asked for primitive camping recommendations. With a bit of unsureness the attendant told us Kettle Pond, but recommended we stop at a state park campsite to get more information.
We pulled up to the window and told the woman at the desk that the Boulder Beach guy told us we can primitive camp near Kettle Pond. She rolled her eyes and sort of scoff-laughed. She told us the only primitive camping she’s familiar with is down the road about 15 miles and called Butterfield Road. So we took the general directions and ran with it.
After what seemed like more than 15 miles and no sign of Butterfield Road, we pulled a U-turn and began discussing an alternate plan. Then a sign from the heavens: Butterfield Road State Forest Access. There is no way to see this sign coming from the park, but once you’re headed back in the park’s direction it’s obvious.
We turned in and took the dirt road back into the forest. Took some random turns here and there to end up in a large, open field filled with wild apple trees. Another success based in suggestion.
Groton Park was the last of Vermont and the time for New Hampshire had come. The White Mountains were an obvious destination, so we stopped in a small town called Littleton for a diner meal and interactions. We sat next to a couple from Maine who were excited to hear of our creeping towards Baxter State Park, and this was met with a list of places to camp and roads to travel for the greatest beauty (Golden Road in Maine).
What came next surprised me at first, but it was also a reminder of the variety of people one may meet whilst traveling.
Eavesdropping is not typically something I focus on, but this diner had a gentleman talking to a young couple about how Colorado is the best, so I opened my ears with curiosity.
The statements didn’t just focus on how beautiful Colorado is, but essentially sold the state as the be-all, end-all. He talked about the air quality being better, the unbeatable stars, and the welcoming people. And with all of this I agree.
I have seen the royal skies open for the Milky Way and the arid air dry my sweaty shirt in minutes. I have been welcome by both city and mountain folk to enjoy the exchange of story and warmth of fire. And with this my love for Colorado grew.
But then my spying ears caught a less lovely selling point: trash talking the northeast. He went on about how the air is heavy and humid, sometimes the rain doesn’t end for days at a time, and the people of the area are superficially nice.
As the aforementioned experiences may illustrate, the people of the northeast are wonderful. Interactions heavily depend on openness and reception, but going in with a standoffish attitude doesn’t typically result in friendliness. And it will set the tone for the next interaction with a Coloradan.
Our simple smiles and open hearts have been met with little resistance and much appreciation. Even in the mean woods of the northeast.
As for all the other details, isn’t that a matter of preference? Some like humidity and heavy air or a rainy week so that the lush greenery can thrive. Yet others prefer the desert where it seldom rains and the sunny sands underfoot persuade time to move slower than usual.
I’m always happy to hear about the love one has for the state they reside in, but the better-than territory just doesn’t feel true to anything. The discomfort of being out of what is known can be a wonderful opportunity, or it can stay a waste of breath filled with complaint and stonewall.
I would just remind anyone busy talking about the locals in generalities to reference a long-shared adage from Raylan Givens:
If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole.
If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.
Treat Feat
This past week brought with it a playful reminder of what it means to say to yourself I’m worth it. Many struggle with this concept for a variety of reasons. Maybe you have a family or family member that always comes before you. Maybe you’re drowning at work and there simply isn’t enough time in the day. Or maybe it’s just easier to forget about yourself and keep moving forward because the list of things to do continues to grow.
Whatever the chosen story, it’s not serving in the ways some think.
There are many moments in the day when it is possible to quickly care for yourself. A breathing exercise can be done at ANY point of the day: in the bathroom, driving in the car, waiting to pick someone up, walking to your next destination, while cooking, etc.
Breathing is a wonderful way to reward the nervous system, which will reward the body as a whole.
: Quick Tip :
Make sure the exhale is always longer than the inhale.
The difference can be felt in your heartbeat — inhale/increased heart rate, exhale/decreased heart rate.
Another idea to express self-worth, in addition to breathing exercises, is any kind of self-care. Getting a massage is on many to-do lists because of the many benefits, yet it’s so easy to put off. To tell yourself it’s not the right time. Your body knows it’s the right time, right now. BOOK IT!
If a massage is too much, do something simple for yourself. Create a before-bed routine to unwind from the day and sleep well. Do some stretching in the morning to prepare your body and let it know the work being done is appreciated.
And if none of that sounds appealing or even accomplishable, then buy yourself some new undies.
As a teenage athlete I tended to shred my underwear fairly quickly. When you’re young and most of the shopping is done by mom, it’s not a big deal. But once on your own it quickly becomes real how much mom was spending on that nice-feeling underwear. So, frugality kicks in.
I was lucky enough to have a family that realized the essentials are called that for a reason. And they can be given as gifts for whatever occasion. I was gifted underwear for my birthday, Christmas, or random, spontaneous times when I was thought of at the store. I’ve had friends recommend underwear brands and toss me a new pair they received in the mail to try them out. I have spent the majority of my life a magnet to fresh underwear.
Even with the endless underpants blessings, there are still times when I buy myself underwear. I am much more willing to retire a pair into its next phase of use — rags. Or if I’m hiking and happen to tear a hole in the leg, it’s on to the next one.
And the action of buying a new pair of underwear is also the statement I’m worth it.
Yet others have a different approach. Shred it until it looks nothing like the original… or someone tosses it for you. It may be laced with jokes about how the new holes in the material allows one to prepare for bathroom use quicker or that air flow is encouraged, but the core statement is this is not a priority for me.
And we allow that idea to bleed into our perception of self.
Whether it’s time constraints, financial budgeting, or simply a lack of foresight, it’s easy for self-care to fall to the wayside. Ironically, the best way to care for others is to care for yourself. Showing others that you’re worthy may inspire them to prioritize some self-care or simply a moment to reflect.
My aunt is very good about keeping her routine. She doesn’t allow much of anything to throw her off, and this focus has served her well into older age. My mother, on the other hand, speaks a bit enviously about how nice it must be to think and act in such a way. To be able to prioritize personal needs and make sure, everyday, they are met. It’s a difference in choice.
My aunt knows that if she does a list of things for herself she will not suffer when giving. She has planned herself into the day so that it is easier to be of service.
My mother, on the other hand, loses herself in the act of service. Everyone else comes before any thought of self-care. The dedication is wonderful, but it comes at a cost. And it’s a cost that is felt.
The opportunity that comes with someone’s self-negligence is the ease with which it is to serve them. Since my mother doesn’t take all the steps to care for herself, it is an easy opening to care for her. Pouring some hot water and epsom salt into a foot bath is met with copious amounts of gratitude. Booking a massage with Hannah or Beth is an hour of heavenly carefreeness. Or the time typically spent preparing a meal can, instead, be used to stretch or exercise, and I get to flex my cooking muscles.
But I’m not always there to serve my mom. And so, the importance of self-worth continues on.
The necessity of seeing yourself as worth your own time and care is essential.
It may be the difference between feeling frustration or anger and approaching things with grace. When you feel taken care of it’s easier to give. You’ve taken what you need and it’s time to share.
Our bodies and minds run on systems of exchange. When the scale tips to one side, something needs to be done to encourage equilibrium. Sometimes it’s the little things like a foot bath or a night routine, yet other times it’s a financial investment in yourself. And still other times call for something different.
Regardless of where you are, take the moment to ask what do I need?
It may be as simple as new undies.
HERBAL SPOTLIGHT: CATNIP
CATNIP: Feminine - She - Water VIRGO: Earth - Venus - Fixed
STONES: Amethyst - Selenite - Sugilite CHAKRA: Crown
Catnip helps in search of love. She may entice and attract the beauty and happiness we seek. Or she may aid in the care deserved though frequently forgotten. She will run through strands of hair or dance upon the wounds of skin to budge the wishes for care. A soothing mother who whispers reminders of you are enough.
She comes together with romantic Rose to spell the bond that becomes love. A frenzy of pheromones to attract with lust, her charm to tease a follow me. The helpless fool that takes her in is warmed like whiskey washing the belly within. Though the drunk be weary of her bond of blood to avoid the dragon’s offense for habits gone bad.
This resilient mother turns little concern toward the elements she needs. Instead, she is the benevolent ointment jar, open, to aid and repair. A rub of relax for aches of existence. A spreading of soothe for the hot air building within. A mother to nurse unconditional giving.
Catnip is the bringer of courage for the hesitant hangman. Chew her root and feel a fierce disparity to her sedating nature. But do not forget, the warrior heart does not dictate a sensitive soul. The smoke she creates is not vapors of boil. It is the cloak of soft protection.
Space Invaders
Invasive species can be found in most places, and sometimes the damage being done can be seen in a shorter time than expected. Take, for example, the ash borer beetle. Its range in the United States has gone from northeastern states like Maine and New York, to the south, and headed west for Colorado and Oregon.
Green shows ash tree range — Red dots are Emerald Ash Borer beetle detection.
I grew up in an area of the midwest where ash trees were constantly incorporated into our days: climbing and swinging, napping in the shade, staring up at the reaching network, or simply observing the presence of a timber giant. The nearby lakes had ash trees scattered all around and the neighborhood felt calm and carefree with all the welcoming shade cast by the branches and leaves.
I grew older, moved away, and forgot about the trees that marked my youth. Time passed, as it does, and I returned to the place where my greatest transformation occurred. But it was nothing like the memory I held. This place, too, had transformed.
What used to be sprinkled with aged titans leading to connecting waterways or the beginnings of forests is now a sparsely-decorated vast lawn. It possesses its own beauty, but it does not compare. It does not welcome the same play, nor does the land seem to hold the same wisdom. It is the dying of elders and a search for what comes next.
A song hangs in the air: all things must pass.
But not all things must be destroyed. This damage was done by the ash borer beetle spreading westward and propagating. The adults eat foliage and cause small damages, but the larvae feed on the tree’s inner bark and disrupt its ability to move water and nutrients.
If you have an ash tree ready for removal here is a disposal guide.
I recently experienced a brand new invader on the eastern end of the United States in Philadelphia: spotted lantern flies.
Since the spotted lantern flies are rather large and don’t bore into anything, you’re likely to notice them upon entering into the area they’re invading (whereas you may not run into an Emerald Ash Borer beetle because they’re small and hidden inside the tree bark).
Spotted lantern flies have similar movement patterns to flying grasshoppers: they jump and fly only to land soon after. Once they spread their wings there is an unexpected display of color — they’re rather pretty. And the nymphs are adorable as they mature into the winged fly.
The spotted lantern fly has been accused of mass destruction and there is research underway to understand the extent of it. What is generally agreed upon is that lantern flies are stressing plants by feeding on sap and producing a waste known as honeydew which promotes the growth of black mold.
Here is an article dispelling some of the potential falsehoods about these creatures.
Since my experience with invasive species is based in destruction and forced change, I began actively killing lantern flies to help control the population (and sate the craving of the immature sadist deep inside some of us). Sometimes destruction feels good, especially if it’s tied to a seemingly righteous cause, but as new research is done and different species find new ways of interacting, a world of possibility opens with the spotted lantern fly.
Spotted lantern flies may help feed honeybees (honeydew for honeybees).
The honeydew they produce as waste is attractive to wasps, yellowjackets, hornets, and honeybees. In a world worried about how honeybees will continue, will the savior come in the form of an invasive species? It would be a much more symbiotic situation than the Ash trees have with the borer beetle. It may be the passing of an old way and development into something altogether different. Hopefully minimizing the carnage.
I reflect on the daily carnage humans cause and the penance that doesn’t come in the form of a foot stomping us out. Only we assess ourselves and other living things as good or bad. Wheat fields at the cost of regenerative farming could be labeled invasive, but it is one of our many, necessary food sources. The plastic scattered across the globe, high and low, is the cost of convenience and profit. In a humorous twist of fate, we have begun to stomp ourselves out.
We have made decisions without foresight and, though the immediate gratification was grand, the future will repackage those decisions in turmoil and struggle. But just like the lantern fly being a possible provider to struggling bee populations, maybe something unpredictable will come from it. Maybe all of this destruction is needed for the collective conscious to move onward into the new. Or maybe we mark the end of a cycle and the opening into a major transition.
Whatever the end result may be, what comes to mind with utmost frequency is — I don’t know.
We don’t know. But we’re always learning and moving for something.
Some of us are destroyers and others are healers. But the healer also destroys and the destroyer also heals.
To be is to welcome paradox. The struggle of living awareness may be the ability to accept life’s paradox. To be able to say I don’t know and feel alright about it. To sit in unsureness and tell yourself that there may not be a simple answer, rather, a complex, individual interpretation that doesn’t exactly match any other experience.
Yet other times it’s easy to know the answer, like taking your ice cream back from the ants…
Meet the Tribe: Beth
The Wildmoon tribe grows!
Beth joined us as a master massage therapist all the way from Harrisonburg, VA.
Below is a Q&A to get to know and SCHEDULE JOY with her.
Beth is available Sunday-Wednesday 10am-6pm.
What steps led you to Castle Rock, CO?
The West, I feel, has always called to me. I needed to raise my daughter back East. Now that she's grown, I began my search for what was next for me. I cast a wide net while searching for work and found Hannah in February. She and I hit it off immediately, and that set me in motion.
How did you get into massage therapy? What attracted you to the art?
I remember as a young girl, I would rub my own feet when I had growing pains. I didn't know why it made me feel better, I just knew that it did. Massage had always been something that lingered in my mind. It wasn't until 2015 that I finally decided to enroll into massage school.
How do you approach treatment? What styles/techniques do you offer?
I like to approach each client the same. Tell me about yourself, what you do for work, how is your life treating you, etc. This helps me to get to know my clients better and where they may need more focused work. I like to incorporate different modalities into my sessions, as every session doesn't require the same thing. I use hot and cold stone treatments, trigger point therapy, deep tissue, therapeutic massage, Thai Yoga, and passive stretching.
What should new patients know for before, during, and after, a massage?
I enjoy punctuality in my clients, new or old. I understand that life happens and lateness occurs. However, I find that it just adds to the stress and doesn't always benefit your session. Not to mention, that it unfortunately cuts into the session making it shorter.
During a massage: I just ask that an open line of communication occurs. Feedback regarding pressure is a key element to any beneficial massage.
After a massage: Drink lots of water, stretch, ice any soreness, and, my personal favorite, take a long soaking bath. I realize not everyone has that luxury.
What part of being a massage therapist motivates you most?
Helping people to feel better is what motivates me most. Knowing that I helped rid someone of pain they have been suffering with for any amount of time is one of the best feelings for me. Not only does it make me happy for my client, but it also helps me to feel confident within my own practice and work as a healer.
What are some of your self-care practices?
As I mentioned before- baths. I love them, swear by them, encourage them. I also stretch, and find ways to work on my own muscles at home.
Do you recommend any additional practices for clients to incorporate into their daily life (ie meditation, self-massage, stretching, essential oils, etc.)?
Yes, yes and yes. Self care is very much needed. Especially in the busy lives most of us live. I find that it brings awareness to oneself and what is happening within our bodies. I encourage my clients to stretch and show them ways they can massage certain muscle groups in between our sessions.
Brand New Hemp Tinctures
Beautiful new products just hit the shop!
FAT FLOWER Hemp Oil —— CBD, CBG, or CBDV specific.
We’re used to seeing CBD and CBN and CBG, but CBDV? Might be a new one.
Well, the chemistry can be kept pretty simple to see the difference in the molecules. A CBD (cannabidiol) molecule has a carbon chain of 5 atoms, also called a pentyl chain. This carbon tail binds to receptors in a specific way. Any change to the structure will change the way it interacts with its receptor.
CBD (Cannabidiol) Molecule
Notice the green box. Count the peaks and valleys after the point of attachment — 5.
This is the pentyl tail.
CBDV (Cannabidivarin) Molecule
Notice the same green box. Here there are only 3 points after attachment.
You may also notice that the remainder of each molecule is exactly the same. This is one of the reasons why cannabinoids have subtle differences and a powerful overlapping effect — or Entourage Effect.
The Entourage Effect is essentially the idea that these molecules (CBD, CBDV, CBG, etc) work together to have a greater individual affect. The greater the number of different molecules, the stronger the synergistic result. Sounds familiar…kind of like …TEAMWORK.
So far we’ve only named phytocannabinoids in The Entourage Effect, such as CBD, CBDV and CBG, but that’s just the beginning.
Let’s grow the team.
In addition to phytocannabinoids, terpenes and flavonoids get added to the equation.
Many are familiar with terpenes based on the daily aromas we can explore or aroma therapy education.
Citruses get their signature smell from a terpene called Limonene.
Pine trees have a terpene called Pinene.
Linalool is a very beautiful terpene scent found in coriander, lavender, and sweet basil.
Terpenes give plants a specific scent composition, which then has a specific influence on us. Some terpenes calm while others elevate our mood. Others possess anti-inflammatory properties when smelled or used topically.
Our noses are part of our memory and can bring up some of the most potent nostalgia imagined, as anyone walking into their grandmother’s or mother’s kitchen can attest to. If changes in mood and inflammation can begin in the brain, whether through smell or breathing exercises, it brings us back to the power of the mind.
Our final team member is flavonoids. Most are familiar with flavonoids because they are in all the natural foods around us. There are 6 kinds of flavonoids:
Remember how certain cannabinoids had similar molecular structures? Flavonoids share a structure called the flavan nucleus. It’s why all the molecules on the left look similar.
Flavonoids are responsible for the beautiful variety and expressiveness of flowers, fruits, and leaves. They also help plants protect themselves from the sun, pathogens, and plant-eaters.
WITH OUR POWERS COMBINED…. you get the idea.
The most diverse and colorful diets seem to offer the greatest amount of benefit, and it makes sense using the concept of the Entourage Effect: a greater number of different flavonoids yields more opportunity for teamwork.
This works for hydration as well: simply drinking water will only do so much, but add in electrolytes and all of a sudden your body experiences a change in the available resources. There’s a new team in town!
So if we put it all together, here is what the Cannabis sativa plant looks like with the entire Entourage.
Depending on the desired outcome, there is something for everyone with this gorgeous plant.
Want to try something new for depression or anxiety? HERE is a study testing the Entourage Effect on mood disorders.
Maybe it’s pain relief you’re looking for? HERE is a study about pain relief and terpenes.
Having trouble sleeping? HERE is a study on what CBD can offer.
It is also important to mention that your body has an endocannabinoid system (prefix endo- means internal). This system helps the brain regulate mood, memory and stress, by, itself, producing endocannabinoids. The body then has receptors (CB1 & CB2) so the cannabinoids produced by the body can travel to where they are needed and utilized.
BREAKDOWN: The human nervous system has its own production plant and receptors for cannabinoids. Our bodies are made to use cannabinoids in many different ways and for many different purposes. When used with intention and care, these molecules may be exactly what you’re looking for.
By the way…
FAT FLOWER sources all their hemp locally (Certified Organic Colorado-grown hemp).
We’re so excited to be carrying these wonderful oils that can be used for focus, relaxation, or a blissful energy boost.
Check out FAT FLOWER online store for more educational information about hemp oil & flower or to meet Matt and Erin.
Stay Hydrated
Summer safety is everywhere. The temperature goes up and talks about sunscreen and hydration begin. Countless posts containing suggestions on how to stay safe and utilize summertime…
But something seldom brought up when discussing the body and its ability to function in a specific environment is electrolytes.
Water’s roles in the body are endless, but the major focus here is:
Temperature regulation
Flushing waste out (kidneys and liver)
Moistening tissue (especially mucosal membranes like mouth, nose, and lungs)
Utilizing minerals in bloodstream
Especially if you’re sweating (exercise, illness, etc.), electrolytes need to be replaced. The electrolytes to focus on are sodium, potassium, and magnesium.
A good balance of these electrolytes allows your body to function optimally:
Retain water while sweating.
Properly regulate blood pressure.
Maintain muscles wellness (prevent cramping or spasms).
Maintain alertness and prevent tiredness.
Electrolytes can be found in sports drinks or coconut water, but those come with higher counts of (possibly processed) sugar. Sugar is definitely required in the recovery process, especially when working out, but not all sugars are created equal. Personal favorite: Honey.
Here is a fast, easy electrolyte recipe that will keep your body running well through the summer heat.
Ginger optional but highly recommended.
Don’t like ginger? Add some mint. Flavor it with your favorite berries or a slice of pineapple. Just be sure the lemon, salt, and honey are part of it and drink up the nurture.
Pink Himalayan salt contains all three aforementioned minerals (potassium, sodium, and magnesium).
Lemon juice has potassium, vitamin C, and vitamin B6 (B6 helps convert food to energy).
Honey is the powerhouse of the three and contains calcium, copper, potassium, magnesium, sodium, phosphorous, and zinc.
The sugar from honey is also a great little boost for any workout. Talk to any older generation jiu-jitsu practitioner or instructor and they’ll probably tell you about a honey consumption habit before and after practice. The body requires a nutritious sugar to boost and build.
Give your body what it needs so that the time spent hiking, training or simply sitting and sweating, is time spent feeling great.
Be sure to get some of that sun while you’re at it!
